Eavesdropping the Central Park
by catty-cat-cat
Summary: Piles of idiotic, stupid, absurd, and crazy dialogues of our friends from the Central Park Zoo. Let's see their actions behind their masks. Author's note inside. Care to RnR?
1. Chapter 1

**Eavesdropping the Central Park**

**By: catty-cat-cat**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Penguins of Madagascar and 'Nguping Jakarta.' I only own this fic.**

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**A/N: Hey, guys. I'm in the middle of practice exam right now, but never mind about that. I've just read this blog called 'Nguping Jakarta,' which in English means 'Eavesdropping Jakarta.' That blog was really funny! Anyway, I intended to make the PoM version of it. But due to my dry sense of humor, I'll pick five of all actions of the Central Park Zoo residents. So please review if it's funny, tell me if it's funny or not, and please no flames.**

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**1. So you're counting the third eye on the forehead?**

Marlene: "I wanna buy new soft lenses, the ones with colors ..."

Kitka: "That's cool! I also think to buy those!"

Julien: (chirped in) "Yes, you can buy the ones with different colors in each eye—one with blue, another one with green, and another one with yellow ..."

Skipper who heard them wanted to interrogate them whether they were all space squids or not.

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**2. Meaning I just have to draw your face, ma'am?**

Ms. Alice: "Now you can draw human."

Doris: "But, ma'am, I always draw the human ugly ..."

Ms. Alice: "It's okay if it's ugly. The most important thing is it's good."

The whole classmates who heard Ms. Alice then were confused how to draw human being.

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**3. How much does it cost for one bottle, then? **

Skipper: "What's the difference between wasps and bees?"

Julien: "Wasps are just stinging people, while bees are producing honey." (Pause) "Wait, I heard that there is something called oil wasps! So, wasps are producing oil while bees are producing honey!"

Kowalski who heard them suddenly wanted to fry Julien with the oil wasp.

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**4. You can passed it off, ma'am ...**

Ms. Alice: "Now where are those twelve graders? Why are they absent?"

Hans (the student of the other class): "The twelve graders are off, taking a field trip. Don't you remember?"

Ms. Alice: "Oh, so they went on field trip." (Pause) "Oh, my God! I should have joined them! Oh, dear, I haven't packed up yet!"

The whole class who heard her suddenly wished that they had the same homeroom teacher.

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**5. I thought the fish is made of cork ...**

Private: "Then what is the difference between fish Cork and catfish? I think they have the same faces!"

Julien: "You know; the female catfish is called fish cork."

Then the entire car passenger burst out laughing along the way.

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**A/N: If there's something that you don't understand, please ask. I'll be happy to see you on PM.**

**Review?**


	2. Chapter 2

**Eavesdropping the Central Park**

**By: catty-cat-cat**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Penguins of Madagascar and 'Nguping Jakarta.' I only own this fic.**

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**6. ****You mean it gotta be **_**jpeg**_** format or what?**

Kitka: "Hey, when did you start to eat, suddenly you just left the rest on the plate?"

Marlene: "Oh, from the last time you guys vent the umpteenth episode."

Darla: "Oh, you're right. I didn't realize that I've vented for a few _capture_."

When Kitka and Marlene heard her, they felt the need to capture the contents of the conversation earlier.

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**7. ****So who's crazy here?**

Kowalski: "Alright, no pens, pencils, erasers, and any other stationary are on the table! The only thing on the table is pencil!"

Psychological test in the Penguins' HQ—the rest of the penguins who heard Kowalski's statement now felt that Kowalski had finally cracked.

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**8. You can use it one side.**

Maurice: "Huh? To fill in the sheet you gotta use 2B pencil? But I only have 4B! What am I gonna do?"

Julien: "You can just break it to half."

Julien's statement was heard by Kowalski who then pondered if there was such logic.

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**9. You should stand without gripping.**

Darla: "I can't ice skate!"

Maurice: "But you've ever ridden a roller coaster, right?"

Darla: "... Well, duh ..."

Maurice: "They say that if you've ever ridden roller coaster, then you can ice skate."

This conversation was heard by Marlene who then came to them and explained the difference between blade and coaster.

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**10. Stainless steel is anti-**_**over**_**.**

Marlene: "Oh, it's a new watch, isn't it? What brand is it?"

Lulu: "Yeah!" (looked at the watch) "It's stainless steel!"

Blue Hen: "Oh, you gotta be kidding me! Stainless steel is water proof!"

Marlene suddenly felt that she wasn't sure if she would fit in with this group.

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**A/N: If there's something you don't understand, please PM me.**

**Review?**


	3. Chapter 3

**Eavesdropping the Central Park**

**By: catty-cat-cat**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Penguins of Madagascar and 'Nguping Jakarta.' I only own this fic.**

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**11. Are you blind?**

Julien: (pointing the Zoovenir Shop) "Hey, that is the shop we were looking for, right?"

Kowalski: (sarcastically) "No, it's a fish store!"

Skipper who walked with them then deduced that Kowalski finally had myopic eyes.

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**12. He really is a scientist ...**

Kowalski: "Oh, I just wish that there is a tool that can warm food with a wave ..."

Maurice who heard him felt relieved, thinking that Kowalski still cook with firewood.

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**13. Hey, you got a wrong script!**

Savio: "Clemson, can you get that pole for me?"

Clemson: (got up and picked the pole, gave it to Savio) "Here, thanks."

Savio: "Your welcome."

Hans who walked by and heard their conversation suddenly thought that Rico was saner than the two of them combined.

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**14. You will need spectacles.**

Kowalski: "Hey, have you read _The Magician_?"

Marlene: "Oh, I've read it! My favorite is chapter 20!"

Kowalski: "Hey, that's my favorite, too! I read it many times!"

Marlene: "Oh, and I also love chapter 15. It's fantastic!"

Kowalski: "Chapter 15? I think I haven't read it."

Marlene: "..."

Skipper, Private, and Rico who were planning to give Kowalski a book for his birthday heard their conversation—and intended to keep their gifts for their own, planning to give Kowalski a pair of spectacles for his birthday.

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**15. Is he really **_**in**_** the TV?**

Private: "Skipper, which is Robert Pattinson?" (pointing at the TV)

Skipper: (sipping his coffee, didn't see the TV) "Well, he's the one in the TV."

Private: "Huh? _In_ the TV?"

Skipper: "Yes, the one _in_ the TV! Didn't you see him _in_ the TV?"

Kowalski who heard their conversation suddenly thought that Skipper was once a mechanic before he became a soldier.

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**A/N: Well? What do you think? :3 Tell me what you think in the box below, please. :3**

**Review?**


	4. Chapter 4

**Eavesdropping the Central Park**

**By: catty-cat-cat**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Penguins of Madagascar and 'Nguping Jakarta.' I only own this fic.**

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**16. But it's not in the option, monarch!**

The penguins were playing guessing game in their HQ.

Skipper: "Which one is higher; a captain or a general?"

Private: "It's a general!"

Suddenly Julien burst in the HQ and begged to join the game. Skipper reluctantly accepted him in the game. Once Julien sat down, Skipper decided to ask his question earlier.

Skipper: "Alright, which one is higher; a captain or a general?"

Julien: "Soldiers! Because a general or a captain cannot make a high pyramid alone! If soldiers make a pyramid then they will be higher than the general or the captain!"

The penguins: "..."

Kowalski: "I can't believe I say this, but—he has the point, really ..."

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**17. What size do you want?**

Alex seemed so tired of running here and there, and Marty saw him grumbling under his breath as he ran. Marty who was confused by his friend's attitude approached Alex when the lion stopped.

Marty: "Hey, Alex. What's the problem?"

Alex: "I had been looking for Melman and Gloria, but they didn't show up! Where are they, anyway?"

Somewhere in a zoo, Julien somewhat felt relieved when he could see the small Mort and Maurice in his kingdom.

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**18. Pretends to understand ...**

Kowalski had invented a machine and it was the time for him to explain the whole thing to the penguins.

Kowalski: (after a long explanation) "So, that's the way it works."

The penguins: (nodded)

Kowalski: "Do you understand?"

The penguins: (shook heads)

Kowalski suddenly wanted to throw himself in a well.

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**19. Go become a door!**

Ms. Alice: "The break has done, why do you want to get out? That's it; you cannot go in and cannot go out!"

Skipper's classmates wondered if Skipper would stand at the door until the end of the period.

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**20. Yeah, and the ocean is blue and a branch is brown ...**

Skipper: "Private, go take a lemon leaf from the outside."

Private: "Which lemon leaf, sir?"

Skipper: "You know; the green one?"

Private ran outside with ticklish sensation around his belly that made him giggling along the way after Skipper said that.

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**A/N: If there's anything that you don't understand, PM me right away. :)**

**Review?**


	5. Chapter 5

**Eavesdropping the Central Park**

**By: catty-cat-cat**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Penguins of Madagascar and 'Nguping Jakarta.' I only own this fic.**

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**21. What a modern world!**

Doris: "Yeah, my mother had a fish farm just around our home, but I haven't been able to see her and her farm.

Marlene: "Is there any facility like—you know, light?"

Doris: "Oh, of course it has. It's a place to turn the fish on—you know?"

Marlene: "...?"

Doris: "Oh, I mean—to warm the fish! I was wrong ..."

Kowalski who was eavesdropping their conversation was sure that that farm was a robotic farm.

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**22. Huh? No, it's **_**big**_**!**

The penguins and the lemurs were gathering in the HQ for a meeting. They talked about Marlene who was always alone without a roommate.

Skipper: "So yeah, of all of us, Marlene is the only otter without a roommate."

Private wanted to object that not only Marlene, but also Barry, but Julien immediately cut his words.

Julien: "So she is a _miniature_. Eh, wait—it's _minority_, not _miniature_."

Rico suddenly felt that Marlene could be a display cabinet.

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**23. The acting is so awkward ...**

Skipper was watching TV.

Skipper: "Is it right if that actress is good? Well, yeah, she had ever received an _awkward_ as the best actress ..."

Then right after that, the rest of the penguins looked at him with awkward faces.

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**24. Too high-tech.**

Skipper had called Kowalski from his lab, but he still didn't come out. So he stood up from his chair and approached the lab. When he opened the door, he was surprised that Kowalski finally had a laptop.

Skipper: "Kowalski!"

Kowalski: (realized that Skipper was already in his lab) "S-Skipper! This—this isn't what you're—"

Skipper: "Where did you get it?"

Kowalski: (stammered) "I-I—"

Skipper: "Does it have internet? Can I make an e-mail account? I always wanted to try to make my own internet account." (Approaching the laptop)

Kowalski: "..."

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**25. You don't even have the TV.**

Skipper: "Ring-tail, if you're doing this again, I will never forgive you!"

Julien: "What? But—why?"

Skipper: "You've done so much trouble in this zoo—I won't let you make another trouble!"

Julien then suddenly kneeled down, folding his paws as he started to pray. Maurice came out of nowhere and somehow had a phone in his grip, recording Julien's prayer.

Julien: "Oh, sky spirits, please strengthen my heart to go through this temptation. Please do not punish him because he is my friend. Whatever he said, I will always do it. That's why; please strengthen my heart to go through this."

Skipper asked to himself; from where did Julien watch soap opera? And where the heck did Maurice find that phone?!

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**A/N: If you have something to ask, feel free to PM me.**

**Review?**


	6. Chapter 6

**Eavesdropping the Central Park**

**By: catty-cat-cat**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Penguins of Madagascar and 'Nguping Jakarta.' I only own this fic.**

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**26. Don't be too mathematical, please.**

Private: "I want to make a story. Kowalski, can you help me, please? How long do you think I should make it?"

Kowalski: "How should I know?"

Julien: (chirped in) "Oh, I know! It is 10 meters! Haha! I am smart, yes?"

Skipper who walked by and heard their conversation suddenly wanted to hit Julien's head with Kowalski's mathematic book.

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**27. Cinderella's trick.**

Rhonda: "Lulu, can you say Cinderella twenty times?"

Lulu: "Cinderella, Cinderella, Cinderella, Cinderella, Cinderella, Cinderella, Cinderella ..."

Rhonda: "What is the name of the princess that got poisoned by a witch?"

Lulu: "—Cinderella—"

Clemson who passed by suddenly wanted to search on Google to check if Lulu's answer was right.

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**28. Of course it is, you fool!**

Savio wanted to buy a bracelet. To do that, he went to a stand that sold bracelets.

Seller: "Welcome, sir. Is there anything you want?"

Savio: "Um, can I buy the glow-in-the-dark bracelet? I heard it's pretty trendy."

The seller gave him the bracelet.

Savio: "Wait, it's glowing in the dark, right?"

Seller: "Yes."

Savio: "Then why is it not glowing when there's light?"

Seller: (irritated) "You can put it in your mouth—you'll see if it's glowing or not."

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**29. Maybe you've been troubled for too long.**

Kowalski explained something to the little Private after the little one asked him something. When he finished, he asked if Private understood. But something was off, if Private would say.

Private: "But, Kowalski, why is that?"

Skipper: (popped out from nowhere, chirping in) "It's its fate, Private. That's why." (Passing by)

Kowalski who saw it suddenly felt pity to Skipper.

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**30. So you say that the doll live ****and is going to kill him ****or what?**

Skipper: "Marlene, do you think there's something wrong with the private?"

Marlene: "What do you mean?"

Skipper: "He's been acting weird, lately. Every time we're on the day off, Private would stay away from his plushy."

Marlene: "I think he's getting mature, so that's why he's getting away from it. There's nothing to worry about, Skipper. You're too paranoid as always."

Skipper: "Yeah, but he does that every time we watch _Chucky_."

Marlene: "..."

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**A/N: If there's something you don't understand, PM me.**

**Review!**


	7. Chapter 7

**Eavesdropping the Central Park**

**By: catty-cat-cat**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Penguins of Madagascar and 'Nguping Jakarta.' I only own this fic.**

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**31. Just, go join the social gathering ...**

Blowhole's lobster minions were gathering in the central lair. They were chatting around with their friends, one with another. Suddenly, they stopped.

Lobster #1: (poking one of his friends) "Hey, do you know? Skipper has—two eyes!"

Lobster #2: "Oh, really?! I can't believe it! Is it true?!"

Lobster #3: "I also heard that Skipper has three men in his team! They said that one of his men loved doctor's sister!"

Lobster #4: "Really?! I have to check on _facebook_ to ask my friends about this!"

Lobster #5: "I'll check my _twitter_ if anyone knows this!"

Blowhole who passed by with his Segway heard their conversation and intended to throw away all of their gossip facilities.

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**32. Useless dialogues.**

There was an attack from Hans. Skipper, Rico, and Kowalski were preparing for battle while Private somehow was ordered to stay at the zoo.

Marlene: "Hey, what happened?"

Private: "Hans comes for revenge on Skipper!"

Maurice: "Oh, no! We better evacuate!"

Marlene: "We have to run!"

Julien: "No, running is safer!"

Everyone: "..."

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**33. Burn!**

The lemurs invited the penguins and Marlene to have dinner in their habitat. Maurice served many food and fruits—including smoothies and deserts. Fortunately, he also served fried tuna and smoked salmon, so the penguins could eat the dinner. Everything was going nicely, until Julien spoke up with his mouth full of food.

Julien: "Whoa! This food is so hot! Skipper, pass me the chili!"

Skipper stared at the lemur for a while until he asked to Rico to hack up a gallon of gasoline and lighters.

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**34. ****You can climb!**

The penguins were playing hide and seek. Skipper was it and the others spread up to search for hiding places. Unfortunately for them, Skipper was good at finding someone, so he easily found Private and Rico. Didn't want to be found, Kowalski finally searched for the safest hiding place.

Kowalski found one—an old and unused well beside the zoo. He jumped inside and landed softly on the ground.

Kowalski: (laughed) "This way, he won't find me that easily!"

Fifteen minutes, thirty minutes, one hour, two hours, three hours ...

Kowalski: "Hey, can somebody pull me up?! Anybody out there?! Anyone?! Hey!"

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**35. Of hate and haters.**

Skipper: "I hate you!"

Julien: "I hate you more!"

Skipper: "I hate you most!"

Julien: "I hate you more than I hate Mort!"

Skipper: "I hate you more than anything else in this world!"

Julien: "I hate you even though I'm annoyed with you!"

A silence followed.

Skipper: "I hate—gah, forget it." (Walked away)

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**A/N: If there's anything you don't understand, PM me. :)**

**Review!**


	8. Chapter 8

**Eavesdropping the Central Park**

**By: catty-cat-cat**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Penguins of Madagascar and 'Nguping Jakarta.' I only own this fic.**

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**36. If so then the honor wouldn't be huge.**

Julien had snatched one of Kowalski's inventions again. They chased one another in the whole zoo.

Kowalski: "Julien, get it back! That is not a _toy_!"

Julien: "What?! Are you talking about _soy_ sauce?!"

Kowalski: "No, not _soy_ sauce—_toy_! _Get it back_ here, Julien!"

Julien: "I don't know who is _Getit Pack_—but I know _Jackie Chan_!"

Kowalski: "_Jackie Chan_ is even further that your _unidentified_ word, Julien!"

Julien: "What?! What is this _undentivid_?!"

Skipper who saw them chasing around the zoo from the edge of the pool was thinking why Julien could be a king when he could be a comedian.

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**37. Return to the pre-historic time.**

Private watched BBC history channel with Kowalski. When it was finished, he approached Skipper who was sipping his coffee.

Private: "Skipper! I've just watched this history channel with Kowalski—"

Skipper: "Yeah?"

Private: (stammered because of too excited) "—and—and—we finally know that the footprints of the pre-historic creatures are really big!"

Skipper: (interested) "Really? How big?"

Private: "Oh, they are _so_ big, Skipper! I also noticed that a _shark_ footprint was a—oops ..."

This was heard by Skipper who had just known that pre-historic sharks were walking on the ground, Kowalski who was certain that Private was daydreaming when they watched the BBC history channel, and Rico who thought that Dr. Blowhole might could walk without his Segway.

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**38. This is an insubordination, soldier!**

Kowalski was teaching Private how to count hours, minutes, and seconds.

Kowalski: "Now, how many minutes are 120 _minutes_—eh ...?"

This was heard by Skipper who happened to pass by and then thought that all of this time, Kowalski had switched all of the facts therein.

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**39. Can I charge my smartphone, then?**

Marlene: "I've bought my contact lenses! Aren't they beautiful?"

Private: "Oh! I know contact lenses! The one with the electricity and we're used to plug cable to it ..."

Marlene: "It's an _outlet_! Don't you know the difference?"

Private: "... Oh ...?"

This was heard by Kowalski who suddenly wanted to charge his smartphone. [Because _outlet_ in Indonesian almost has the same pronunciation with _contact lenses_ in Indonesian. Check Google Translate]

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**40. Are you chatting or teasing?**

Private: "Skipper, I'm really annoyed!" (Entered the HQ with a humph)

Skipper: "What is it, young Private?"

Private: "You know that we already have new neighbors, and most of them are younger than me."

Skipper: "Uh-huh?"

Private: "There are tiger cub and bear cub. But they're so much bigger than me! These days, children are taller and bigger than the teens!"

Skipper: "What do you mean by that?" (Annoyed, too)

Private: "Huh?"

Skipper: "Are you teasing me or what?!"

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**A/N: Okay, I know that number 36 is not very funny. I made it myself. That's why it's a bit dry ... :P Number 39, you can check Google Translate.**

**Review?**


	9. Chapter 9

**Eavesdropping the Central Park**

**By: catty-cat-cat**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Penguins of Madagascar and 'Nguping Jakarta.' I only own this fic.**

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**41. Does pro wrestler need four pounds?**

Private was talking about his origin country and its currency to his team.

Private: (with his usual British accent) "Yes, if we buy the bag, its cost is usually no more than four pounds."

Skipper: "Four what?"

Private: "Four pounds—they stand for four Pound Sterling."

Skipper: (a bit deaf) "Pro-_pro sterling_? What kind of currency is that?"

Kowalski: (guessed that Skipper was playing a game and decided to join too) "Is that the other name for boxing?"

Rico who actually knew United Kingdom's currency and boxing believed that Skipper and Kowalski were actually failed in geographic and economic lesson.

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**42. The reason why you shouldn't talk to a stranger when it's not necessary.**

Let's imagine that the humanized Skipper met a stranger from Madagascar named Julien.

Skipper: (tried to be nice) "Hello, what's your name?"

Julien: (apparently didn't know much about English) "Yes, how are you?" (Randomly answered)

Skipper: (eyes twitched, tried to be cool) "Err, your name, your name."

Julien: "Oh, it's Julien."

Skipper: (nodding) "Where are you from?"

Julien: "Madagascar."

Skipper: "Really? Where did you specifically live?"

Julien: (randomly answered) "Tokyo."

Skipper: (mentally slapped himself, tried to be cool—failed) "Yes, um—do you speak English?"

Julien: "Oh, no, I don't speak Estonian."

Skipper: (mentally growled) "Are you out of your mind?"

Julien: "Yes, I am." (Randomly answered)

Skipper: (growled for real this time) "Can I kick your butt?" (Barely held his emotion)

Julien: "Yes, you may. I don't really mind." (Randomly answered)

Skipper: "Hit him!"

In the next second, Skipper's men popped out from nowhere and you can guess what would happen next.

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**43. You're the seed and I'm the pot.**

Julien: "Maurice, give me the sweety-sweet mango!"

Maurice: "Here it is, Your Majesty." (Gave the mango)

Julien: "Must I peel it for myself, Maurice? Why cannot you have a feel for your king? The mango cannot be peeling for itself!"

Maurice just rolled his eyes. He then jumped down and peeled the mango. When he finished he jumped on the bolder where Julien sat on his throne, waiting for the mango.

Maurice: "Here it is, Your Majesty." (Gave it again)

Julien: (reached for the now peeled mango) "Yum, sweety-sweet mango, you are mine!" (Opened mouth)

Suddenly, Julien pressed the mango a bit hard, causing the seed to fall to his mouth. Julien choked.

Maurice: "Your-Your Majesty!" (Panicked, hit Julien on the back)

Julien: (gagged) "Ugh! Maurice, this seed wants to kill the king! Punish it!" (Pointed at the seed)

Maurice: "Well, it's your fault that you pressed the mango hard. After all, seeds can't be punished."

Julien: "Are you to be kidding me, Maurice? Do you want me to become a _pot_ for planting mango? Be punishing it right now!"

Skipper who walked passed by accidentally heard Julien's statement and realized that 'Go Green' day was almost arrived. He planned to make a surprise for Julien based on his own statement as he snickered evilly and rubbed his flippers along the way.

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**44. Are you an animal or a robot?**

Maurice: "We're ready to hold the party, King Julien!"

Mort: "Party feet!" (Randomly shouting)

Julien: "Okay, Maurice! Let's gather my subjects and let the party begins!" (Grooving already)

Maurice: "But, Your Majesty, you have taken a bath, haven't you?"

Julien: (stopped) "Oh, of course, silly Maurice! Look at me—I am shining with this royal fur!"

Maurice: "You used shampoo, right?"

Julien: (annoyed) "No, I am to be wearing gasoline—oh, of course I am wearing shampoo, you stupid! Isn't it to be obvious-ing?"

Marlene and Kowalski who walked passed by and heard Julien's statements now couldn't stop laughing out loud.

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**45. Going around and round and round and round ...**

The zoosters were gathering around the lemur habitat, seemingly to discuss something, including the penguins.

Maurice: "Now, Your Majesty. You can start the speech now."

Julien: "Oh, of course, of course. We must start this speech, so we can start this meeting. To start this meeting, we must start the speech. And because we want to start the speech, we must start the meeting. If we want to start the speech—"

Skipper: (annoyed) "Get on with it, Ring-tail! You're already getting on my nerves!"

Julien: "Oh, be patient. To start this speech, we must be patient. To wait the speech to be started, we must be patient for the speech. Because we have to wait for the speech, we must be patient."

Skipper: (_real_ annoyed) "_Ring-tail!_"

Julien: (ignoring Skipper) "Now, we must start the speech. To start the meeting, we must start the speech. And if we want to start the speech, we must start the meeting. To start the speech—"

Kowalski: (to Skipper) "Sir, permission to go back to the HQ?"

Skipper: "State your business."

Kowalski: "I just want to take my migraine medicine."

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**A/N: For those who live in UK, please don't be offended by number 41. I made it just for fun and this has nothing to do with anything. If you don't understand, PM me.**

**Review?**


	10. Chapter 10

**Eavesdropping the Central Park**

**By: catty-cat-cat**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Penguins of Madagascar and 'Nguping Jakarta.' I only own this fic.**

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**46. Say yes or no!**

Hans & Clemson: (arguing)

Hans: "Yes, it's true! You just don't get it!"

Clemson: "No, it's wrong! You're the one who doesn't get it!"

Hans: "Argh!" (Looking at Skipper) "Skipper, it's true, right?!"

Skipper: (blank) "Huh?"

Hans: "Just say yes!"

Skipper: (suspicious) "Why?"

Hans: "Just say yes so I can be happy!"

Skipper: "No."

Hans: "..."

Clemson: (blowing raspberry at Hans)

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**47. Daddy, it's just a ringtone.**

Skipper was in a cafe, having a dinner without his men. While he was chewing his favorite smoked tuna, he heard a weird whispering child's voice. "Daddy, daddy ..." It made Skipper alarmed and he turned his head here and there to look for the source of the sound. But he found none. Skipper decided to shrug it off, thinking that it was just his mind playing tricks on him, and continued to eat again.

But the child's voice was still heard. "Daddy, daddy ..." Skipper frowned in confusion. He silently gulped and turned his head again to look for the source of the sound, but once again he found none. It sent chills to Skipper's spine before he decided to go out of the cafe. But before he could stand up from his seat, a man behind him laughed.

The man: "Sir, it's just my phone's ringtone."

Skipper: "..."

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**48. That shame ...**

Hans was walking along the street when someone he didn't know suddenly waved his hand to him across the road. Didn't know what he had to do, Hans decided to play along, waving his hand to the stranger. He then continued walking.

It didn't take too long—about ten seconds later—for Hans to realize that the stranger who waved his hand was actually greeting someone _behind_ Hans. He noticed this when the stranger crossed the road and was actually talking to the other man behind Hans himself.

Hans tried not to show his embarrassment in front of the people.

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**49. He's gonna be an assassin!**

Skipper and Private were driving on the park with their pink car. Skipper taught Private about combat driving again.

Private: (drifting fantastically, stopped the car)

Skipper: "Aces, Private! I never thought you would learn this fast."

Private: "Thanks, Skipper."

Skipper: "Tell me; where did you learn how to drift like that?"

Private: "Oh, I learn it from the video game that Rico showed to me!"

Skipper: "Really? What is it?"

Private: (beamed) "_'Grand Theft Auto'_! I've finally reached six stars, Skipper! Isn't it amazing?"

Skipper: "..."

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**50. Don't be too cocky.**

It was Kowalski's hatch day and the penguins were planning to give presents for him.

Skipper: "Well, I think we can give him books."

Private: "How about a dolphin plushy? He loves it, right?"

Rico: "New smartphone?"

Skipper: "Hmm, smartphone can be his gift, too."

Kowalski: (eavesdropping) "Oh, you want to buy a new smartphone for me?" (Beamed)

The penguins: (stunned to see Kowalski)

Skipper: "Don't be cocky! Who said we want to buy a smartphone for you?"

Kowalski: "..."

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**A/N: Sorry for the late update! I was having exams and now I'm free! For lunacorns14, I don't know if you really read this or not. I just wanna say, happy birthday! :D**

**This is the final chapter of Eavesdropping. Yes, I'm intending to finish this fic. Sorry if anyone is upset to hear this. If there's anything you don't understand, PM me. ;)**

**Review!**


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